I'm sure you've all heard the expression "everything happens for a reason". I'm not sure I believe that, but I do think everything can be used for a lesson. Things don't always make sense when they're happening. So, then, why is it so easy to see the path it forms when I look back in hindsight?
I have two children. My daughter, the older one, was always easy. There were no "terrible twos", adolescent tantrums, drugs or running away. She followed the rules, accomplished the things she set her mind to do, and thrived in whatever situation she found herself. We never had any worries about how she'd turn out.
My second child is a son. He's as different from his sister as night is from day. As a toddler, I couldn't turn my back on him for a minute. If it was quiet, I'd better go see why. He pushed every boundary we set. He disregarded anything he didn't find important, like homework or chores. But he made it through high school.
The other day, my hubby and I were reviewing the past year and a little beyond. We started out talking about how things went financially and what we were able to accomplish, though not quite everything we'd hoped. Then, we moved on to our kids and the places they are in their lives and what they achieved over the past year.
Our daughter in a preschool teacher in a head start program on the Cherokee reservation in North Carolina. She's also going to college. Her plate is full, but her life is rewarding.
Our son attends culinary school in New York. I mentioned to my husband how glad I was that our son had attended pastry school prior to culinary school. I thought he needed that extra time just to get ready for the pressures of his chosen industry. My husband said he was glad for the job our son had, working in a fast-paced kitchen under a chef who saw his potential and urged him on. Then we realized he'd never have had that job had he not worked in a German bakery prior to that and made friends with the pastry chef there who, ultimately, got him the job in the restaurant.
Each step was needed to build up to the next. There's no doubt that his "personality", his tenacity, as a child helped prepare him for a really tough industry and will enable him to thrive there. Looking back and seeing how each step happened is humbling for a parent.
Let's keep taking steps and making strides. Don't be discouraged when, in the moment, it seems like progress is slow-going. I challenge you to set aside some time, on a regular basis, to look back and see just how far you've come. Recognize the steps, knowing if they happened in any other order, you'd be out on a limb.
