Silent No More

Shame.
That's a word I don't have a lot of experience with.  I can say that I haven't really done many things that I'm ashamed of doing.
I don't shame myself.
But I'm finding out recently how heavy is the weight of the shame others put on me.
I don't like it.

"If you hadn't been born, none of this would have happened."
Shame on you.
"You were illegitimate?"
Shame on you.
"You were molested... abused... thrown away?"
Shame. Shame. Shame.
"Why aren't you like everyone else?"
Shame on you.
"Can't you just make it look like everything is alright?"
Shame on you.
"Why do you have to talk about those things?"
Shame on you.

Well, I refuse to carry that anymore.  That shame is yours, not mine.
My story has a voice and it refuses to be silenced.
I don't want your hand-me-downs, and I don't need your pity.
I'm an adult.
None of this was my fault.
I refuse to continue to kowtow to the powers that be, allowing them to define me as they see fit, rather than BE strong, to be me.

From now on, I'm making my own way.  I'm following my own rules.
I'm going to continue to not fit in or be like you expect me to be.
I've been through things, and that has changed me.
It makes me different.  That's good.
I wouldn't wish it on anybody to be like me.

So you have a choice to make.
Choose wisely, not like in the past.
Don't label me.
Don't misjudge me.

And if you do, shame on you.