It's just too much!
I feel like one more illness, diagnosis, issue is going to push me over the edge.
There's "strength", then there's "having no other choice". And that's where I am right now. My body is failing me, and with it go my emotions. I'm so used to being able to control at least one of those, that when they're both beyond my control I just feel lost. Tears are constantly just below the surface, threatening to spill out whenever they please, with no regard to person or place.
I don't understand what is going on, and I question so much right now. I just want to be "me" again. But I suppose that definition is forever changed. I have to deal; to re-invent who I am. I'm isolated right now, and I've done it to myself. Please don't take it personally. We all deal in different ways. I need to compartmentalize.
Reality, life, bites sometimes. But the alternative is not an option. So, I will trudge on. It just sucks that House might have been wrong.
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